Friday, September 4, 2009

Mean Girls!

We have managed to survive 4 years, 1 week and 2 days of school before really having to deal with a "Mean Girl"! I've never quite understood the concept of being mean. In my opinion it is too dang hard to be mean. Oh sure, I've been in a bad mood more frequently than I would care to admit. And I'm sure I've snapped at someone when it was totally unnecessary. But to be in that continuous state of nastiness is just too draining. Where do people find the energy to behave in such a way?

I know kids can be mean and cruel. And I especially know that life is all about dealing with difficult people. So it is important for my kids to learn that early on. I'd say 90% of what they tell me about so-n-so hurting their feelings, I respond with an "oh, just ignore them. They're just trying to make you mad!" But then there is the few times that my radar goes up and the "mom gloves" come off. There have been way too many incidents that have occurred in our area lately that have physically made me nauseous just thinking about. I don't EVER want my kids to think that I'm not willing to stick up for them and fight for them. I want them to feel like they can come talk to me about a problem they're having with someone and together we can work out a solution.

Last night I told Abbey she needs to stand up to this girl. This girl needs to know that Abbey isn't going to put up with any of her junk! Abbey of course was concerned that she would get in trouble. But I told her that the teacher was aware of the situation and said it was OK for Abbey to speak up! So we decided to work on some come-backs that Abbey could use. Here are the two best ones:

"So-n-So, if you're going to be rude like that, then go tell it to the corner, cuz that's the only place that's going to listen to you!"

"So-n-So, I don't like you well enough to miss you if you weren't here!"

I'm am now asking all of my loyal readers out there to channel some mean girl! Give me some good comments that I can give to Abbey to use. Please remember that these are 4th graders and I DO NOT condone violence or profanity...even though I would love to give this child a pop in the face!


Tara said...

Bless her heart, girls are brutal in school. I remember that!

Dani said...

A snappy come back might make Abbey feel better, but I still think she would probably be beter off to know that what this other girl says and does doesn't mean anything about her, but rather shows how sad the other girl is.

I would tell her, "you know I feel sorry for you that you are so mean, and that no one likes you, but you aren't going to upset me." Leave at that and ignore her. Acting upset, and taking the time to keep making comebacks is only going to give the girl negative attention and make her feel like she has some control over the situation. She's more likely to keep on harrassing Abbey that way.

Lil. Bit said...

Tell Abbey that Aunt Bethany says that they are just jealous girls! :) Remember that from now on or else you will just wind up getting hurt by some of the stuff people say just to make themselves feel better because they feel like you are better than them! :)Never go to their level and make fun of them just take the high road! :) Love you!